- National Sexual Assault Helpline
- Statistics of Male Sexual Assault
The National Sexual Assault Helpline's phone number is 1-800-656-5673 (HOPE).
For Information on Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR) and Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD), respectively see the links below.
Domestic Violence or "DV" is a term that is commonly used, yet many people do not understand what it is, or what behaviors are considered to be DV in nature. According to the National Coalition Against Domestic Violence (NCADV), DV is the "willful intimidation, physical assault, battery, sexual assault, and/or other abusive behavior as part of a systematic pattern of power and control perpetrated by one intimate partner against another." Additionally, the NCADV reports that DV has several different forms, including physical, sexual, and psychological violence and emotional abuse. Moreover, the NCADV states that both the frequency and severity of DV may vary from relationship to relationship. Finally, the NCADV reports that the central component of DV is the effort of one partner to maintain both POWER and CONTROL over another individual (What is Domestic Violence?, n.d.)
Some of you may recognize that the central component of DV is similar to that of sexual assault (SA). That is, an attempt on the part of the perpetrator to assert and maintain their power over another individual. Because of the fact that SA and DV are closely related to one another I want to provide both education and resources for those individuals who may have experienced DV in the past, or are currently in a DV relationship. Finally, this is a reminder to both survivors of SA and DV, you do NOT have to suffer in silence, you are NOT alone, and most importantly, never forget that we are not powerless to change our lives for the better.
Crime Victim Assistance Programs
The Crime Victim Assistance (CVA) program is a social welfare program that is funded via bond, bail and other criminal monies. In order for a survivor to receive these benefits, charges must be pressed against the perpetrator, and an application must be completed. If and when the application is approved by the state, these funds are then distributed to help repay a survivor's lost wages, medical bills, the cost of mental health therapy as well as other financial losses sustained by a survivor because of the crime (Office for Victims of Crime, n.d.)
For further information concerning the CVA application process and benefits, please click here.
If you are interested in purchasing wearenotpowerless.com merchandise, please click here.
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Where Are We Located?
What is Domestic Violence? (n.d.). Retrieved September 24, 2016, from http://ncadv.org/learn-more/what-is-domestic-violence
Office for Victims of Crime. (n.d.). Victims of Crime Act Crime Victims Fund. Retrieved September 25, 2016, from https://www.ncjrs.gov/ovc_archives/factsheets/cvfvca.htm
Break the Silence
My name is Caleb Byers and I am a male-identified SURVIVOR of sexual assault. I made this video for one reason. To encourage other survivors to speak out against the person(s) who assaulted them. To any of my fellow survivors who manage to stumble onto my website, remember this, you are NOT alone. Most importantly, never forget that we, as survivors of sexual assault are NOT powerless to overcome our experiences.
If it weren't for someone reaching out to me when I was in Iowa City you wouldn't be reading this now. I know how much just having one person to confide in can help. The worst thing you can do is to stay silent. So, please, tell someone that you trust. Only then, will recovery truly begin.
A Note On Vocabulary:
Some of you may have noticed that I refer to myself using the adjective of "survivor", when it is more common to hear the adjective of "victim" in reference to an individual who has experienced a sexual assault. I hate this adjective and I refuse to use it. Here is why.
For a long time after my sexual assault, I thought of myself as a "victim" and that word defined me. It not only affected how I perceived myself, but how I perceived the world. If there is one thing that you take away from viewing my website, I hope that it is what I am going to tell you now. I am no longer a victim of my experience. I am a human being, just like all of you who are reading this. Yes, I went through a terrible experience. But, I am still here, and I am a stronger person for having survived it. Therefore, I refer to my own self, and any other individual who has experienced rape and/or a sexual assault as a survivor.
Changing the label I used to describe myself, empowered me, it enabled me to move on and to heal from my experience. For better, or for worse, labels have the power to define a person's very existince. So, if you find yourself referring to someone who has experienced a sexual assault and/or rape as a "victim", I highly encourage you to change that word to "survivor". In doing so, your perception of that person will change. They are not weak, or powerless, instead they are strong, and powerful. In changing one word, you can help change a life by empowering that survivor to move on, to heal, and to grow from their experience.
Never forget that change starts with you.
"Be the change that you wish to see in the world." - Mahatma Gandhi
- New York Times Article about: Rape, Trauma, & Brain Memory
- Is it possible to orgasm while being raped? Is it still rape if you do?
- Pictures of Male survivors of Sexual Assault and the words of their attacker
- This is what happens after you are raped: Written by Michelle Shupak
- How to identify Sexual Assault in a simple 3 word sentence
- Post Traumatic Stress "evident" in 1300BC
- Vanderbilt Rape Trial: Defense Blames Alcohol and Campus Culture
- Different ways to support a loved one who is a survivor of sexual assault: Written by Jennifer Rollin
- "I wish that I had never reported my rape." Article written by Kendall Anderson
- Journal Article that analyzes Male Sexual Assault
- Trauma Bonds: Why They Happen
- My Interview With The Daily Nonpareil (Local Newspaper)
- Defining Rape Culture: Facts & Myths: Published in The Daily Nonpareil
- "Grey Rape" Area, There is no such thing!
- Having to See Your Abuser: Advice In Overcoming Fear
- The Daily Nebraskan Interview